Don't get the wrong impression from the title of this entry. I merely am listening to an old song, and I do enjoy the idea of sex and candy together. However, there won't be any narratives of my experiences with sex and candy here. Nope. Can't say I've had much experience with either, of late.
But I do believe that is getting a tad too personal, so I will change the subject.
What I really wanted to rant about today is the high percentage of hot people in the library. I mean, everywhere I turn I run into attractive people. I'm not even exaggerating here. I had no idea that ridiculously good looking people were also academically inclined. Although...if I were to use myself ....well I'm moderately hot and I practically LIVE in the library, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised by how many hot people are here. It's quite distracting though. Especially considering the little tidbit of information I provided previously.
For example, there is this absolutely gorgeous man sitting behind me right now. I noticed him when I was trying to find a cubicle, and made it my mission to try and sit near him (for whatever reason). Unfortunately, the closest spot also happened to be one that WASN'T facing him. I was pretty disappointed, because it means that I have to actually turn AROUND to appreciate his beauty. He's this gorgeous tall and slim blond thing, with perfectly styled hair, and the most smashing tan that I've ever seen. He also seems to be rocking the punk look, which I absolutely adore. In my current state, I am tempted to just walk up to him and ask him to sex me. Ha ha ha. However, I realize how inappropriate that is (on SO many levels, so I'll just let crazy sexy scenarios play out in my head).
There is an element of hope here though; I think one of my girl friends knows him. Therefore, the chances of me meeting him one day are probable. In fact, I do believe we HAVE met previously. My drunken recollections are telling me that it was a booze-fueled, and very cold evening in Trappers (which I am slightly ashamed to admit, since it means I was in Trappers). I do believe I flirted with him shamelessly, as per usual. Drinks and me = a very straightforward attitude towards just about everything. I'm very straightforward when I'm sober, but holy shit, you get some booze in me and I tell it like it is. In all matters. Ha ha ha.
Anyways, I think I said some pretty.....R rated things, and I do believe he was game, but my girl friend decided at this moment that she wanted to leave the bar. Anyways, I'm 99.9% positive that that guy is THIS guy. Mmmmm. What a shame that I missed that opportunity.
Who knows what the future brings. I'll just make sure to party with her more, in the near future. OR I could just ask her about her sexy blond-god friend, and whether or not he likes cute blond girls.
But with my luck, he'd have a girlfriend by now, or be gay, or some other crazy scenario that means I can never have him. That's just how it goes with me.
Anyways, I am off to grab some eats.
Cheers!
A moderatly well-written account of a 20-something Canadian woman's experiences in the world. Be warned...this could get personal.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Invisible Woman?
I've got some Justin Timberlake tunes blasting in my ear right now, and let me tell you...it is really making me think. Now, I can just picture the grimace on your face, so let me begin by saying that the new JT cd is absolutely smashing. I would suggest you check it out, before you make any rash judgements about my previous statement. The song that started the thought process is titled "Losing My Way". Basically, it's a song about some drug addict, who has lost everything in life, and has "lost his way". It's a no brainer.
Anyways, here are the lyrics that got to me: It is breakin me down, watchin the world spin round, while my dreams fall down. Is anybody out there? It is breakin' me down, no more friends around, and my dreams fall down. Is anybody out there? Can anybody out there hear me, cuz I can't seem to hear myself. Can anybody out there see me, cuz I can't seem to see myself. There's gotta be a heaven somewhere, can you save me from this hell? Can anybody out there feel me, cuz I can't seem to feel myself. Losin my way. Keep losin my way. Keep losin my way, can you help me find my way?"
While these lyrics are not horribly profound, in terms of meaning or prose, they somehow speak to me on a certain level. I think the thing that really gets to me is the fact that it touches on the impersonal nature of the world. I mean, I'm sitting here in the library, in a tiny little cubicle, with five other students around me. I have no idea who these people are. We are separated by the walls of the cubicle; walls that go up over my head, so I have to stand up to see anyone. I could sit here all day, and not hear a single person say my name. No one talks. There is no interaction. I could suffer from some weird instant death, and pass out the desk, and no one would notice me. They would more than likely assume that I was napping. If I took a stroll through the library right now, I could find a number of people sleeping on their desks. It's nothing out of the ordinary. We are all so disconnected from each other, that we don't take time to question anything; we always assume that everything is fine.
I think this lack of interaction is appalling. I mean honestly, it's almost scary. How many people go to this school, and how many do I know on a first name basis? I would estimate that I only know 20 or so people by name. The saddest part is that Facebook, that oh so addictive social tool, accounts for the majority of my knowledge of peoples names, at least in the beginning stages of any friendships. I find that horribly pathetic.
I mean, we would rather Facebook stalk each other than go up and actually introduce ourselves. How odd.
I should admit to something though. I do use Facebook. Not to stalk people though, because frankly that is just pathetic. I have met pretty much everyone on my friends list at least once, so I definitely don't use Facebook as a go-between for learning who people are. I have to know them first, before I add them, even if I met them randomly at the bar, or at a party.
But back to my original rant, about being so invisible to the greater world.
This ties back to (please, don't laugh at my use of pop culture references, it's all I know) an episode of Grey's Anatomy that was on TV recently. Meredith fell off the dock, and it took what seemed like an eternity for people to realize that she was missing. I think it was Addison that made the statement wondering if anyone would notice if she went missing. In this day and age, I think it would take a lot longer for people to realize someone was missing, because of how detached we really are. I don't know my neighbours at all, so they wouldn't notice if I stopped showing up at home. I don't live at home, and only talk to my parents on our ritual Sunday conversations, or randomly on MSN from time to time. I talk to my friends on MSN constantly, so I suppose they might notice a lack of MSNing from me. But even that wouldn't be out of the ordinary for a day or so. They would probably just think I was busy with school work, or something else. The only real way that my absence would be noted was if I didn't show up at work, and I can guarantee the first emotion going through any one's head at that point won't be worry over my whereabouts; anger will run first and foremost at this stage. I'd more than likely be cursed to high heaven for missing a shift.
Anyways, the point of this random rant is that we need to really address this issue of being invisible. I get that people want their privacy today, but I feel that it is coming at the expense of something greater. We don't know each other anymore, we don't connect with each other anymore.
No one out there can feel me, because I definitely don't feel you.
Cheers.
Anyways, here are the lyrics that got to me: It is breakin me down, watchin the world spin round, while my dreams fall down. Is anybody out there? It is breakin' me down, no more friends around, and my dreams fall down. Is anybody out there? Can anybody out there hear me, cuz I can't seem to hear myself. Can anybody out there see me, cuz I can't seem to see myself. There's gotta be a heaven somewhere, can you save me from this hell? Can anybody out there feel me, cuz I can't seem to feel myself. Losin my way. Keep losin my way. Keep losin my way, can you help me find my way?"
While these lyrics are not horribly profound, in terms of meaning or prose, they somehow speak to me on a certain level. I think the thing that really gets to me is the fact that it touches on the impersonal nature of the world. I mean, I'm sitting here in the library, in a tiny little cubicle, with five other students around me. I have no idea who these people are. We are separated by the walls of the cubicle; walls that go up over my head, so I have to stand up to see anyone. I could sit here all day, and not hear a single person say my name. No one talks. There is no interaction. I could suffer from some weird instant death, and pass out the desk, and no one would notice me. They would more than likely assume that I was napping. If I took a stroll through the library right now, I could find a number of people sleeping on their desks. It's nothing out of the ordinary. We are all so disconnected from each other, that we don't take time to question anything; we always assume that everything is fine.
I think this lack of interaction is appalling. I mean honestly, it's almost scary. How many people go to this school, and how many do I know on a first name basis? I would estimate that I only know 20 or so people by name. The saddest part is that Facebook, that oh so addictive social tool, accounts for the majority of my knowledge of peoples names, at least in the beginning stages of any friendships. I find that horribly pathetic.
I mean, we would rather Facebook stalk each other than go up and actually introduce ourselves. How odd.
I should admit to something though. I do use Facebook. Not to stalk people though, because frankly that is just pathetic. I have met pretty much everyone on my friends list at least once, so I definitely don't use Facebook as a go-between for learning who people are. I have to know them first, before I add them, even if I met them randomly at the bar, or at a party.
But back to my original rant, about being so invisible to the greater world.
This ties back to (please, don't laugh at my use of pop culture references, it's all I know) an episode of Grey's Anatomy that was on TV recently. Meredith fell off the dock, and it took what seemed like an eternity for people to realize that she was missing. I think it was Addison that made the statement wondering if anyone would notice if she went missing. In this day and age, I think it would take a lot longer for people to realize someone was missing, because of how detached we really are. I don't know my neighbours at all, so they wouldn't notice if I stopped showing up at home. I don't live at home, and only talk to my parents on our ritual Sunday conversations, or randomly on MSN from time to time. I talk to my friends on MSN constantly, so I suppose they might notice a lack of MSNing from me. But even that wouldn't be out of the ordinary for a day or so. They would probably just think I was busy with school work, or something else. The only real way that my absence would be noted was if I didn't show up at work, and I can guarantee the first emotion going through any one's head at that point won't be worry over my whereabouts; anger will run first and foremost at this stage. I'd more than likely be cursed to high heaven for missing a shift.
Anyways, the point of this random rant is that we need to really address this issue of being invisible. I get that people want their privacy today, but I feel that it is coming at the expense of something greater. We don't know each other anymore, we don't connect with each other anymore.
No one out there can feel me, because I definitely don't feel you.
Cheers.
Monday, March 5, 2007
The Five Most Brutal Weeks Of My Life
Starting today, I shall be embarking on the five most brutal weeks of my life. Aside from maybe one night a week, in which I will allow myself to cut loose, and get wickedly intoxicated, I shall be spending the majority of my time in one of three places. The first place will be in class, the second place will be at work, and the third place will be the library. If I manage to squeeze in some social time (aside from the one night a week I am already going to allow myself) it will be a miracle. I don't see that happening. This is all the more reason why I simply cannot have any sort of solid relationship until AFTER I graduate in April. Unless of course I date a party animal that only wants to see me on my one-night-a-week-drunk-fest. But that kind of guy isn't going to want to date me. No, that kind of guy is more the type that will want to take advantage of the craziness that is me drunk. Heh heh.
Anyways.
If I think about things rationally for about two seconds, it becomes clear that I don't have THAT much work on my plate. I mean, I only have three major papers due at the end of March. That's not so bad, considering I have had semesters in which I had FIVE major papers due. So three SHOULD be a walk in the park. Key would being should. For some reason, it seems as if I am blowing everything out of proportion this semester. I mean, coursework-wise. I feel as if I have this massive, three-hundred pound elephant of work on my back. Maybe it's because this semester I am working, which I have never done before in my university career. I definitely took advantage of not having a job in previous years. School is such a walk in the park if you don't have a job. I mean, seriously. I had so much free time last year. The worst part is, I didn't even party last year. All I did was read OTHER books....like...non-school books. In my "spare" time. What the HELL was wrong with me!? I ask myself every day why I was such a geek prior to this summer.
I definitely thank my job at Roots for many things, first and foremost for giving me a LIFE. Ironically enough it is now sucking that life back out of me. Circle of life, eh?
I've decided that I am going to spend every waking moment not at work in the library. I'm going to geek-out, for the remainder of the semester. I need to hammer out this research, so that I can smash these papers out of the park. It is essential that I get decent marks on my papers, because I need to pass my courses, at the very least.
I've never worried about not passing before, but this semester is really out to get me. What with a 48% and a 55% respectively, I can't afford to slack. Not that I was before. I just obviously need to work hard. Or bitch more. Either or.
So at the moment, I am waiting my History as Film class to start. I've been people watching, and making some casual observations. First of all, almost everyone in this class comes in with a friend. I appear to be one of the only exceptions. I feel slightly out of place, because I'm this solitary chica, sitting off to the side (because that is where the power outlet is) typing away on my tiny laptop. My laptop seems to garner more attention that I myself do. People will look at it, and ask me questions about it, but fail to ask any about myself. How odd. I suppose as a person I am fairly mediocre anyways, whereas my laptop is a unique specimen. Eh. The people in front of me are talking about how they bombed the midterm too. I feel slightly better about myself now. I think everyone was taking this class as a joke, and it kind of shocked everyone to realize what a douchebag marker the professor was. I mean, honestly. It's a History as FILM class. FILM. Not the most scholarly source for ANYTHING. But the professor is this young gun with something to prove, and he seems to think that making the class hard makes him a better professor. Frankly, I think he's the biggest twat on the face of the planet, because it is so obvious that he's trying super hard to be this reputable professor. I mean, it is PAINFULLY obvious. Almost like Ross Geller on Friends, when he tries to be a professor and basically fails (because he's such a socially retarded moron). Same deal with this professor. Socially. Retarded.
Alright, well I suppose I should focus on the movie now. We're watching Rebel Without a Cause, and frankly I think James Dean is a dreamboat.
Cheers!
Anyways.
If I think about things rationally for about two seconds, it becomes clear that I don't have THAT much work on my plate. I mean, I only have three major papers due at the end of March. That's not so bad, considering I have had semesters in which I had FIVE major papers due. So three SHOULD be a walk in the park. Key would being should. For some reason, it seems as if I am blowing everything out of proportion this semester. I mean, coursework-wise. I feel as if I have this massive, three-hundred pound elephant of work on my back. Maybe it's because this semester I am working, which I have never done before in my university career. I definitely took advantage of not having a job in previous years. School is such a walk in the park if you don't have a job. I mean, seriously. I had so much free time last year. The worst part is, I didn't even party last year. All I did was read OTHER books....like...non-school books. In my "spare" time. What the HELL was wrong with me!? I ask myself every day why I was such a geek prior to this summer.
I definitely thank my job at Roots for many things, first and foremost for giving me a LIFE. Ironically enough it is now sucking that life back out of me. Circle of life, eh?
I've decided that I am going to spend every waking moment not at work in the library. I'm going to geek-out, for the remainder of the semester. I need to hammer out this research, so that I can smash these papers out of the park. It is essential that I get decent marks on my papers, because I need to pass my courses, at the very least.
I've never worried about not passing before, but this semester is really out to get me. What with a 48% and a 55% respectively, I can't afford to slack. Not that I was before. I just obviously need to work hard. Or bitch more. Either or.
So at the moment, I am waiting my History as Film class to start. I've been people watching, and making some casual observations. First of all, almost everyone in this class comes in with a friend. I appear to be one of the only exceptions. I feel slightly out of place, because I'm this solitary chica, sitting off to the side (because that is where the power outlet is) typing away on my tiny laptop. My laptop seems to garner more attention that I myself do. People will look at it, and ask me questions about it, but fail to ask any about myself. How odd. I suppose as a person I am fairly mediocre anyways, whereas my laptop is a unique specimen. Eh. The people in front of me are talking about how they bombed the midterm too. I feel slightly better about myself now. I think everyone was taking this class as a joke, and it kind of shocked everyone to realize what a douchebag marker the professor was. I mean, honestly. It's a History as FILM class. FILM. Not the most scholarly source for ANYTHING. But the professor is this young gun with something to prove, and he seems to think that making the class hard makes him a better professor. Frankly, I think he's the biggest twat on the face of the planet, because it is so obvious that he's trying super hard to be this reputable professor. I mean, it is PAINFULLY obvious. Almost like Ross Geller on Friends, when he tries to be a professor and basically fails (because he's such a socially retarded moron). Same deal with this professor. Socially. Retarded.
Alright, well I suppose I should focus on the movie now. We're watching Rebel Without a Cause, and frankly I think James Dean is a dreamboat.
Cheers!
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