A moderatly well-written account of a 20-something Canadian woman's experiences in the world. Be warned...this could get personal.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

On Going Through A Time Warp - To The Danger Zone


I had to include the "to the danger zone" part, because I'm going to be watching "Top Gun" on AMC later tonight. I've got the song stuck in my head. Besides, I love getting on the highway to the danger zone....

Anyways, that's totally off topic. Let me set the stage for what I really wanted to talk about.

This weekend marked the very first weekend of the semester, in which all of the Bachelor of Education (B.Ed) students were back in Thunder Bay. As such, it was marked to be the best weekend of the semester, aside from the final weekend (which is also going to include the Education Formal, which I am very excited for). Everyone was raving about how awesome the weekend was going to be; it was to be a three-day extravaganza, and it was.

Thursday night I went with my friend Steph to the Outpost, which is the campus bar. It's actually quite a good bar. It has a capacity for over 2,000 people, and has two levels. It's pretty bad ass. I got a bottle of wine Thursday afternoon, and had decided to drink half of it that night, and the other half Friday night. I did follow that plan, and it turned out quite well for me. Anyways, Thursday was a good night because this cute guy in my English class was basically eye-fucking me all night. It was interesting! I'm fairly certain that the hair was entirely the reason why I was suddenly so attractive to him. I love this hair. LOVE it. Anyways, it was blatantly obvious to me that he was trying to find a way to approach me, and possibly dance with me. One attempt included him making repeated eye contact with me, and then attempting to strike a conversation with me when he noticed that Steph could "get low". Another attempt had him literally THROW a friend at Steph. They started to kind of half-heatedly grind, while I played coy giggling and making Andie's classic :O face. I wasn't trying to repel him, I was merely trying to be coy. However, it backfired and I think he thought I was rejecting him, cuz his friend quickly disengaged and they kind of walked slowly away, as if defeated. As I was waiting for my coat at coat check, he came and stood beside me, and FINALLY iniated a conversation. The topic was lame, because it was about a pathetic presentation I had done in English that afternoon. Then as I was walking back to Steph's, we passed him, and he made another comment, that was meant to tease me. In my drunken state, I kind of shoved him, and fell into him...and we had that goofy drunken stumble. Then he ran away, yelling "Awesome presentation". SUPPPPPER lame, but nonetheless kind of ego boosting.

Friday night was Adam and Kat's birthday celebration. I finished my bottle of wine, and we went to Roxy's. It was a decent night. Nothing big happened, I just danced, and went home around 1. We got McDonalds after, which was probably the highlight of the night! ha ha!

Last night though....was interesting. I was pretty hyped for the night, above the others, because it was supposed to be a Beer Pong Tournament. I had paired myself up with the very sexy, very talented Chantelle. We came up with the awesome name "B.Ed Bunnies". I thought it was clever. Anyways, I made us both shirts, and headed to the party, with high hopes. Turns out we didn't have a lot of flip cup talent. We tried though! We came back from behind twice, and it was always down to one cup each. However, we just couldn't finish that last cup off, and so we lost the tournament. As in THE biggest losers. No wins. Not that it mattered, we had fun. I also go to flirt with the guy that I like. A lot. Shamelessly, in fact. So that was also good. Then, as the party started to peter out, things got REALLY interesting. As the final showdown was going on, my friend Todd asked if he could talk to me for a minute. I wasn't entirely sure what he was going to say to me, but I was apprehensive. Anyways, he started out by saying that he was sorry to have to tell me this, but that he wanted me to hear it from him before I heard it from anyone else. Instantly I got nervous. I asked him what he wanted me to hear. He told me that he had heard a rumour going around that said I had fooled around with him at a party last semester, and that I had thrown up on his stomach. I stared at him, totally dumbfounded. I've never even WANTED to fool around with him. I don't like him in that capacity. At all. I've also NEVER thrown up on anyone in my LIFE. The entire story was completely fabricated. Thoughts kept running through my head, like who could have made up such a stupid story.
"What party!?" I asked.
"The party at Cam's place..."
At first I wasn't mad. I asked him who he heard it from, and he wouldn't tell me. He said he just wanted me to know that he didn't start it, and that he was telling anyone who asked him that it OBVIOUSLY was not true. I told him that I was comfortable enough with myself to be content with the fact that I knew who I WAS and who I WASN'T. This is true. I also wanted him to know that things between us were cool; I knew he wasn't the one spreading the malicious rumour. However, I DID have a desire to know WHO would start spreading something like that.

The person who started the rumour has to be one of the girls that live with Cam. They are the ONLY ones who know I slept there that night. So I've narrowed it down to two people. Two people who would KNOWINGLY make up this OUTLANDISH story about me. I have no idea what their motive would be. Both girls have boyfriends, so it's not like its a jealousy thing, in terms of me "stealing boys". The only thing I can think of is that they just are jealous of me cuz I'm thin and moderately attractive. Women can be really petty like that sometimes.

Essentially, I feel as if I am back in High School once again. It's so frustrating, because I went through this shit 5 years ago, and I never thought I would have to go through it again. I really, and naievely, thought that I wouldn't have to deal with stupid gossip shit like this in my mid twenties. I guess it just goes to show you that people never change. As much as we want to think we're mature, and adult, we can never escape the petty politics of our youth.

Regardless, I am, as much as I want to NOT be, quite angry about the whole situation. It bothers me that these people want to be teachers. This type of shit is exactly the stuff that we, as teachers, have to try to stop on a daily basis. How can we possibly stop young girls from doing it, if we can't stop doing it ourselves? I know I am above spreading malicious rumours and gossip, but clearly these people are not. It's sickening.

Anyways, I could rant on and on about how absolutely ridiculous this situation is, but I think the best thing for me to do at this point is move ON. I need to get past this anger, because they are not worth it.

However, I am stating RIGHT NOW that my mission in LIFE is to STOP this vicious cycle of girls hating on girls. It has to stop. I won't stand for it in my classroom, and I won't stand for it in my personal life either. If I ever find out who started the rumours, I will confront them, and let them know exactly what kind of low person I think they are.

I hope, if you are ever faced with a similar situation, that you will do the same.

Cheers.

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